(President Thomas Jefferson is working in his study, late one night. When he answers a knock at the door, enters Charles, Jefferson’s longtime major domo.)

CHARLES: Good evening, Master President. Do you have a moment?

JEFFERSON: Yes, Charles, of course. Come on in and have a seat. What can I do for you?

CHARLES: First off, Master President, I would like you to know how proud we all are for the part you had in bringing about this new nation.

JEFFERSON: Why, thank you, Charles. It gratifies me that you and the others have been following this with such interest.

CHARLES: Yes, sir, Master President, we have been following it with a lot more interest than you might realize.

JEFFERSON: How is that, Charles?

CHARLES: Well, sir, that declaration that you wrote to get things off the ground was a mighty powerful document.

JEFFERSON: Yes, I did that as part of a committee appointed by the Continental Congress. They allowed me to do most of the writing, although Doctor Franklin and others helped to edit it. What have you been hearing about the document?

CHARLES: Oh, sir, those are the most beautiful words I ever heard. As a matter of fact, I remember by heart every blessed phrase of that precious document.

JEFFERSON: Magnificent! I am proud that you find it inspiring. Did you know that those words are giving hope to people, all over the world, who find themselves under the yoke of oppressive government?

CHARLES: I can imagine, sir. As a matter of fact, that was one of the things I wanted to speak to you about. We get together often and go over those phrases, word by word. The part that really excites us is where you say:

 

“…We hold these truths to be self- evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness…”

JEFFERSON: I’ll be darned! You have memorized it. So, you all like the way that sounds?

CHARLES: We certainly do, sir. We understand with that war and all, it takes time to straighten things out. We were sure that Mr. Washington and Mr. Adams had their hands full, so we didn’t expect too much right away. But, then, when you came into office, we got our hopes up. We said, “Master Jefferson wrote those words, so he’ll certainly know what to do.” So, that is what I wanted to ask you, sir: Do those words really mean what they say?

JEFFERSON: Yes, they do, Charles.

CHARLES: Well, sir, does that mean that you are working on how to provide us with “…liberty and the pursuit of happiness…”?

JEFFERSON: There are things that you do not understand, Charles. You are part of a great institution that is outside of the confines of those sentiments.

CHARLES: I don’t rightly understand, sir.

JEFFERSON: What I mean, Charles, is that you are an integral and important part of an economic system that is incompatible with the tenets of that philosophical reasoning.

CHARLES: I’m really confused now, sir. Do you mean that we don’t fit in to what those words actually say?

JEFFERSON: That’s right, Charles. I think you’re getting it.

CHARLES: Let’s go back to the part where it says, “…all men..,” sir. Are you trying to say that that does not include us?

JEFFERSON: Exactly, Charles.

CHARLES: But, aren’t we men, sir?

JEFFERSON: Legally, no. You see, you are not part of that legal status.

CHARLES: Do you mean that we are not human beings, sir?

JEFFERSON: You are, and you are not. Yes, physically you are Homo sapiens--that is, you are people who think—but under the law you do not have the rights of a freeborn person.

CHARLES: So, sir, all men are not created equal, then?

JEFFERSON: All freeborn men are created equal.

CHARLES: So, you’re not really a man if you’re not born free?

JEFFERSON: That is the law.

CHARLES: But, I thought that new constitution was the law, and that you all based it on what you said in that Declaration paper.

JEFFERSON: That is correct, but under the Constitution you are not a complete person.

CHARLES: Well, sir, what kind of a person am I?

JEFFERSON: For the purposes of accounting, you are considered to be only three-fifths of a person.

CHARLES: What do you mean by, “Three-fifths of a person,” sir?

JEFFERSON: That means, if you took a person such as I and divided his legal standing into five parts, then someone like you would be worth only three of these parts.

CHARLES: What happens to the other two parts, sir?

JEFFERSON: Well, that person still has them, but you only have three.

CHARLES: I see, sir. So, does that mean that I can’t have my liberty until I get those other two parts?

JEFFERSON: In a sense, yes.

CHARLES: Then, what do I have to do to get those other two parts?

JEFFERSON: You would have to undergo manumission.

CHARLES: What is that, sir?

JEFFERSON: That is when papers are signed granting you freedom from bond.

CHARLES: How do I get ahold of those papers, sir?

JEFFERSON: That is left up to me, Charles.

CHARLES: Then, why don’t you sign those papers, sir?

JEFFERSON: (Annoyed) Look, Charles that is exactly my intention. I am going to put it in my will, so that after I’m gone all of you will be free.

CHARLES: But, why don’t you do it now, sir, so that we can be free at the same time?

JEFFERSON: There is nothing I would rather do, but it would be detrimental to my estate.

CHARLES: What do you mean, sir?

JEFFERSON: Apart from the land itself, all of you are the only real wealth that I have. If I were to let you go, I would be in ruin.

CHARLES: I think I understand, sir. For you to stay rich, we have to stay in bondage.

JEFFERSON: (Weary) It is not as simple as that, Charles. It has to do with our whole economic system. If all the gentlemen planters were to give up their people, it would affect commerce all over the United States—not to speak of our import and export relations with other countries.

CHARLES: Land o’ Goshen, sir! I didn’t have any notion we were that important. In other words, it boils down to us being patriots and doing our duty by staying in bondage?

JEFFERSON: Perhaps—in a rather convoluted sense.

CHARLES: How’s that, sir?

JEFFERSON: (Seeking extraction) Oh--you’re probably right.

CHARLES: (Musing) Oh, I’m beginning to understand. So, Mr. Washington and Mr. Adams were not all that busy, huh? Mr. Washington’s folks are going to be disappointed. We all heard that Mr. Adams don’t own anybody, and don’t even like the idea. So, if he wasn’t all that busy, I wonder why he, of all people, didn’t mention us during his presidency. And, since you wrote those nice words, sir, we were sure you would consider us when you became president.

(Becoming interrogative again) So, what you’re saying, sir, is that these United States that you helped to get started, and is based on freedom and justice, would not be able to go on unless we were kept in bondage?

JEFFERSON: (Becoming more uncomfortable) That is one way of putting it.

CHARLES: How would you put it, sir?

JEFFERSON: (Livid) Apparently, these things are much too complicated for you to comprehend, Charles. So, I would suggest we end this discussion right here. Goodnight, Charles.

CHARLES: (Rising timidly, and slowly backing toward the door) Yes sir, Master President. Goodnight, sir.

(As Jefferson’s attention reverts to his deskwork, Charles slowly and respectfully closes the door.)