US Presidents

Following the latest NATO-gnashing; the Helsinki hullabaloo; the two-faced tergiversation; and the intolerable invitation; Trump’s predecessors, from FDR on, have found it necessary to weigh in on the first Fifth Column ever organized in the very Oval Office itself!

FDR: …a date which will live in infamy… We can add Helsinki to that. If Trump knew history, he would have learned from Neville Chamberlain that you can’t make friends with or trust brutal dictators.

Truman: My complaint was as parochial as a do-nothing Congress. Stalin knew about the atom bomb before I did, so I couldn’t have told him – even if I knew! We met at Potsdam, but you don’t invite mass-murderers back home for a game of cards and a drink!

Eisenhower: I led the, “Great Crusade” and started the national highway system. We were allies with the Russians, but it never occurred to me to reveal sensitive secrets to them – especially not in the Oval Office!

Kennedy: The Bay of Pigs; the Cuban Missile Crisis – I managed to calm down Khrushchev and avoid a nuclear war -- without kowtowing to the Soviet Union!

LBJ: I tried to, “Overcome,” but that bastard is making America, “Hate” again!

Nixon: Damn, I was only a crook! Once, when I was drunk, I did hint at a coup – believe me, there are restraints more immediate than the Constitution! BTW: All my conversations with the Commies are well-documented.

Ford: I wouldn’t’ have pardoned Nixon if it were treachery. Let us see if Pence will be that circumspect.

Carter: “Collusion” ain’t new. When I failed to extract the embassy people from Iran, Reagan made a deal with them, so that he would get the credit. But, he never frolicked with Commies, alone, in the Oval Office

Reagan: I walked out on the Ruskies at Reykjavik. Never occurred to me to kiss their asses.

Bush, the Elder: Although I had risked my life for my country, all I said was, “Read my lips…” – and I was out of there!

Clinton: Damn – that sombitch makes other womanizers look good! On top of that, he smells like a traitor.

Dubya Bush: I got out of the draft, too, but instead of a phony foot-spur claim, my daddy made me fly with the Guard. It never occurred to me to join the enemy!

Obama: So, that’s the guy who busted my ass for seven years – about where I was born. Who knew that he was a Putin-pussy?!

*****  *****  *****

They feared the wrath of the Norsemen.

Helsinki was quite different then.

Fears there are now made.

They’ve pulled a great shade.

We’re all waiting to say, “Amen!”

Curtis W. Long

Curtis W. Long

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